Pringles Part: Pringles Tells It All
When this Viewer was in college, we decided to be a Secret Admirer. Not because we had the Unrequited Hots for the target of our admiration, but because we genuinely liked and admired him, and thought maybe having a Secret Admirer would brighten his day. And people like that deserve Secret Admirers as much as others. So This Viewer embarked on an elaborate cut and paste Secret Admirehood, where we would smuggle art projects through campus mail every couple weeks for about a semester. And the most gratifying part of it was when a mutual friend went over to his house, and he showed our friend all the art projects and talked about which one he liked best.
So when we watched Pringles Part: Pringles Tells it All last night, we felt a little like we were watching a Secret Admirehood gone tragically wrong. Okay, so we didn't see the first 15 minutes of the show, but the last 45 went something like this:
1) Squints: Let's pick her up and examine her. She is so sweet. Her strengths are in rising above adversity, such as but not limited to ziplining in Vegas and roller derby. Sending her home was tough, but Pringles knew that there was nothing there when he kissed her the last time. She was Not the one he liked best.
2) Selma: Princess Jasmine was attractive from all sorts of angles. Pringles had "amazing sexual chemistry" with this particular object, and explored all the various ways to interact with it including but not limited to eskimo kisses and eyelash kisses. While he appreciated the message attempted to be relayed by Princess Jasmine, but that message did not speak meaningfully to Pringles. She was also Not the one he liked best.
3) The Democrat: While this one made an initial strong impression, Pringles' attraction to her faded as she did not continue to open up and tell him that she loved him. Had she done this, perhaps he would have moved her one step further towards the top of the pile. But she did not, and so he did not. And once again, she was Not the one he liked best.
4) Tierra Firma: Similar to the Democrat, Tierra Firma first skidded into Pringles' life in a riot of sparkle glitter and feathers. But this particular bachelorette was in poor taste, and never should have been offered up to Pringles. He feels ashamed to have once counted her among his favorites. Badly done, ABC. She was, in the end, Not the one he liked best.
Then we heard about a few random "projects" too homely and tragic to deserve their own segment: 50 Shades, who got drunk and told Pringles repeatedly about her mother, and Drunk Daniella. And we also learned more about Hillshire's own project of sending Pringles random notes, which is not dissimilar to Secret Admirehood. Our personal favorite was the following: "I have a major crush on you and your arms are hairless." We don't really think Pringles is probably right for Hillshire, but we like her style.
Stay tuned for next week, as we continue on our Dramatic and Emotional Journey.
-KLo
So when we watched Pringles Part: Pringles Tells it All last night, we felt a little like we were watching a Secret Admirehood gone tragically wrong. Okay, so we didn't see the first 15 minutes of the show, but the last 45 went something like this:
1) Squints: Let's pick her up and examine her. She is so sweet. Her strengths are in rising above adversity, such as but not limited to ziplining in Vegas and roller derby. Sending her home was tough, but Pringles knew that there was nothing there when he kissed her the last time. She was Not the one he liked best.
2) Selma: Princess Jasmine was attractive from all sorts of angles. Pringles had "amazing sexual chemistry" with this particular object, and explored all the various ways to interact with it including but not limited to eskimo kisses and eyelash kisses. While he appreciated the message attempted to be relayed by Princess Jasmine, but that message did not speak meaningfully to Pringles. She was also Not the one he liked best.
3) The Democrat: While this one made an initial strong impression, Pringles' attraction to her faded as she did not continue to open up and tell him that she loved him. Had she done this, perhaps he would have moved her one step further towards the top of the pile. But she did not, and so he did not. And once again, she was Not the one he liked best.
4) Tierra Firma: Similar to the Democrat, Tierra Firma first skidded into Pringles' life in a riot of sparkle glitter and feathers. But this particular bachelorette was in poor taste, and never should have been offered up to Pringles. He feels ashamed to have once counted her among his favorites. Badly done, ABC. She was, in the end, Not the one he liked best.
Then we heard about a few random "projects" too homely and tragic to deserve their own segment: 50 Shades, who got drunk and told Pringles repeatedly about her mother, and Drunk Daniella. And we also learned more about Hillshire's own project of sending Pringles random notes, which is not dissimilar to Secret Admirehood. Our personal favorite was the following: "I have a major crush on you and your arms are hairless." We don't really think Pringles is probably right for Hillshire, but we like her style.
Stay tuned for next week, as we continue on our Dramatic and Emotional Journey.
-KLo
posted by KLo @ 4:15 AM
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